Sunday, November 4, 2012

Stupid scale.

I gained two pounds. :P
I was at a child's birthday party, full of ice cream cake (my ULTIMATE favorite) , pizza, and all the things that are HUGE temptations for me. I did not have a single bite. I packed my lunch. I made good choices. I still gained two pounds. This, in my mind, only reiterates my thought that I can literally LOOK at unhealthy food and gain weight. :)
This weight gain got to me. Yes, it's only two pounds. No, it shouldn't have gotten to me. Yesterday, I felt thinner, excited, and hopeful. Those two pounds sent me into this silly hopeless spiral. The usual self-deprecating thoughts began. "I will always be overweight." "I can't do this." "I will always be a 'big girl.'" It. Is. Silly. I did exactly what I said I wouldn't do- I let the scale determine my worth.
Those two pounds could have been anything. I weighed myself at a different time of day than I usually do. I retained water yesterday (not sure why). It could be 1,000 different things that don't matter. Instead of celebrating making it through a tempting situation without wavering, I beat myself up because of the numbers on that stinkin' scale.
I refuse to give up this time. I refuse to let those numbers determine how I feel that day. I am working hard, and WILL see results.
It's amazing to me how I have to outwardly fight the natural thoughts in my head. But I'll get there. :)

3 comments:

  1. It happens to me too. For me, it's usually water weight.

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  2. You will gain weight before you lose it if you are exercising. Your body has to build muscle mass before it can burn fat.

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    1. At the time I wasn't working out, so I couldn't blame it on muscle. :/ But s'all good now. ;)

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